Feast Of Fools
by oneredneckgoddess
Summary: Flash gets hurt on a mission....insanity insues...chap 4 up 010806
1. Not Necessarily Lost, But Definitely Con

Written in response to the challenge by Bruce and Diana Wayne. Thanks this was way too much fun!

Not Necessarily Lost, But Definitely Confused

Somewhere in Death Valley

"Are you sure that there's supposed to be a bad guy out here?" Flash asked J'onn through his comm. link. "Because we aren't seeing anything but rocks."

"There was a massive energy reading coming from the northern end of the park less than five minutes ago. Keep looking," J'onn said.

Flash turned to the two other members J'onn had sent with him and rolled his eyes. Green Arrow had his arm wrapped around Black Canary's waist; she had her head on his shoulder. They were watching the sun slowly light the eroded badlands.

"Can't you two get a room?" Flash asked loudly.

The two popped apart. Black Canary glared at Flash. Before she could say anything a loud explosion echoed through the valley. Flash took off with the love birds right behind him. The northern end of the park was crumbling to pebbles as a huge black dragon rose toward the rising sun. Standing on top of the dragon's back was Vandal Savage.

"That would be so cool if he wasn't the one standing up there," Flash said as he skidded to a stop.

Black Canary watched the monster on the beast ascend. "Maybe we should contact Fate, Etrigan or Zatanna. They might be a little bit more qualified to handle a dragon."

"Fine, let's just keep it busy here. We don't want any civilians getting hurt," Green Arrow said.

"J'onn we found your energy reading. It didn't happen to mention Savage and a dragon did it?" Flash asked as tried to leap onto the dragon's back.

Batman answered, "Did you just say 'dragon'?"

"Yeah that would be the long lizard thing with wings right?" Flash answered sarcastically. "By the way, you guys wanna send someone with magical abilities out here. This one might be out of our league." He laughed. "Get it… out of our League!"

Batman silently groaned at the reference to Zatanna, Fate and Etrigan being their own special "Magic League". "Just keep it busy and don't get yourself killed."

"Whatever you say Bats."

"Batman to Zatanna, Fate or Etrigan."

Fate was the one to answer. "We're busy. What do you want?"

"Vandal Savage just let a dragon loose from Death Valley." Fate muttered a very bad word under his breath. "What was that?" Batman asked.

"I said: We're on our way."

The three magicians arrived at the national park. Green Arrow was lifting a boulder off Black Canary's leg. The creature had hit a rock formation with its tail which caused a rock slide. Flash was keeping the creature busy on the other side of the park. Fate and Zatanna headed towards the action, leaving Etrigan to help Arrow lift the boulder, something he was not happy about.

They arrived at the southern end of the park in record time. Flash was taunting the dragon with his actions and Savage with his tongue. "Come on Mr. I-am-immortal. Can't you make that thing go any faster?" He spun around and shook his booty in the dragon's face then turned to face the creature and stuck out his tongue. The dragon let out a roar that sent Flash flying into the side of the cliff. Zatanna ran to help Flash up; Fate stepped in front of Savage.

"I only have one question for you: How did you know to find the Onyx Fire Dragon here?"

Savage smirked. "I left him here almost a thousand years ago. Of course this was under water at that time, so it took me longer than I expected to find him."

"Great," Zatanna muttered to Flash. "He knows the stupid beast."

"Which one?" Flash asked in response. "Both qualify."

Fate was keeping Savage's attention on him, giving the other two time to make a plan and Etrigan to get to their location. Zatanna thought back to her other encounters with dragons. "We need to get Savage off its back if we want to recapture it."

"And we do that how?" Flash asked.

"Anyway possible."

"That's the best answer you got?" She nodded. "We're doomed."

"Thanks for the support, Flash." Zatanna watched Savage. "When I say so, run up the dragon's tail and get Savage off that thing. Etrigan should be here by then and we can catch the dragon. Go, now!"

Flash took off, following Zatanna's directions. Etrigan arrived right after Flash grabbed Savage. As soon as the men were clear Fate, Zatanna, and Etrigan begin to chant. The dragon roared its displeasure as it became surrounded by a thin white smoke. Savage had Flash well occupied. The two were fighting atop the nearest rock formation.

"Come on slowpoke. You gotta move faster than that to hit me!" Flash taunted Savage as he ran circles around the villain.

Savage finally noticed what the magicians were doing to his dragon. He began a counter spell. The dragon roared again, shooting a stream of fire from its mouth. The fire ball hit the rock formation where Flash and Savage were standing. The rock crumbled beneath their feet. A chunk of it fell at Fate's feet and broke his concentration. The dragon, now free from the magicians spell, caught Savage before he hit the ground. Flash was trying to run up the falling rock, but there was too much debris. A piece of rock hit him in the head and he went down with the rubble.


	2. Confusion says

Confusion Says

Watchtower

Flash woke with a start. "Who, what, why?"

"You are very fond of doing that," J'onn said.

Flash looked around him. He was in the med bay of the watchtower, attached to a bunch of little wires and tab things. Black Canary was lying a few beds over. Her right leg was wrapped in a soft cast reaching from her mid-thigh to mid-calf. She was sleeping, Green Arrow watching over her. He looked up and noticed Flash was awake.

"It's pretty bruised and she broke her knee cap, but other than that she's going to be ok," he told the speedster.

"Not too bad considering the size of that rock," Flash nodded. "So what else happened?"

"After the rock fell on you, Savage escaped. But he was already retreating, so we decided to regroup and get more help."

"You are on restriction for the next three days until your concussion clears up and your ribs heal," J'onn said, injecting something into his arm. "Pain killers," he replied, noticing his patient's attention on the needle.

"Sweet," he replied as he hopped off the bed and dashed out of the med bay, ignoring J'onn's attempt to stop him. Seconds later he was on his butt in the middle of the hall.

"Problems?" Supergirl asked as she helped him to his feet.

"Floor go wavy, me go splat," he answered, holding his head.

"Did J'onn even release you from the med bay yet?"

"Yeah, but I think he forgot to mention the Watchtower was gonna spin like that."

J'onn's voice floated out of the med bay, "You did not stick around long enough to find out."

Supergirl laughed. "Well at least you can speak coherent sentences again."

"Yep, it's one of my many talents. Want to see some more?"

She smiled and leaned in towards him, "By the way, you looked kinda cute with that dazed expression on your face." She winked and floated down the hall.

Flash stared after her, not entirely sure that actually took place. "I have GOT to find out what pain killer J'onn gave me." Putting the incident out of his mind he continued down to the dining hall. He bumped into Batman, who was on his way out and holding a cup of coffee in each hand. "Monitor duty?"

"Something like that," he replied, continuing on his way.

Flash shrugged. He must have imagined the incident in the hall. Bats was acting normal. He zipped through the line and took a seat with John, Shayera, Superman and Diana.

"You know I'm right," John was saying.

"No you aren't," Shayera replied.

Flash leaned over to Diana. "What are the arguing about now?"

"I don't know but it's beginning to irritate me. How are you feeling?"

"Lousy, but food should help," he said, taking a big bite of hamburger.

Diana watched him for about two seconds, shook her head and gathered her things. "Shayera. Shayera. Hey Earth to Hawkgirl!"  
Shayera's head whipped around to Diana. "Hawkgirl is dead. How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"Got your attention didn't it? We still on for tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Your place. Six-ish," she replied. Diana nodded then headed toward the tray disposal.

"What was that all about?" Superman asked.

"Nothing," Shayera replied, going back to her meal.

The three men just shrugged. Women stuff. They continued to eat in silence for a while. But of course Flash was at the table, so it didn't last long. At least he remembered to swallow first.

"Where are the magicians?"

"They went to Kasnia to figure out how Savage escaped," John answered.

"Have they had any luck?"

"Not really."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," Zatanna said, coming up to their table.

"_Must seek revenge!_" the brightly colored parrot on her shoulder squawked.

"Where'd you get the bird?" Shayera asked.

"Savage's hide out. He's really slipping. He left plans and directions to his hide out in his cell. It was weird. Anyway we found Polly here in the warehouse he was using."

"_Kill the Justice League_."

"Well, he left nothing out did he?" Superman asked.

"Just wait until he hits the cuss words," Zatanna said with a grin.

"_Domination!_"

The alarm sounded and J'onn's voice came across their comm. links. "Savage just let the dragon loose in Hollywood."

"Yes!" Flash cried, jumping up from the table. "Round two!"

"Flash, you are on restriction," J'onn reminded him gently.

"Oh yeah." The others looked at him. "Go on, give him one for me. I'll find something up here to amuse me. Watch the flamethrower on that thing!" he yelled after them.

"Don't worry Ace, we got it," John said.

"_Damnation!_"

"Flash, do something about that talking nuisance would you, please? He's seriously beginning to annoy me," Shayera said.

"Sure, Feathers." She gave him a funny look before following after the others.

Flash took the parrot from Zatanna and wandered through the Watchtower. Every so often the parrot would squawk out something that would cause the other League members to give him funny looks. He just shrugged. There wasn't much he could do about it. He wandered into the main gathering room and found Stargirl doing her homework.

"Hey Flash! How do you spell pulchritude?" she asked him.

"I don't even know what that is," he replied.

She sighed. "It means great physical beauty."

"Oh. Why do you need to know?"

"We're doing a paper on the sociological aspects of New York and I asked Batman for a synonym for fake beauty and he told me that, and then disappeared."

"Sounds like Bats," Flash muttered.

"So can you spell it for me?" she asked, hopeful.

"No."

"_Kill the Justice League_," Polly interrupted.

"And the parrot has a repeat button. Swanky," he said sarcastically. "Sorry, kid. Go ask Steel, he's smart."

She sighed in disgust and went back to her paper. Flash continued on toward the hawk's nest. He figured the parrot would be happy on it's stick thing and since the nest was the closest thing to it, he hoped to dump the bird there. He zipped up there and found Beast Boy and Raven making out.

"Hey how'd you two get on the Watchtower?" They sprang apart and looked guiltily up at Flash.

"Hey you're out of the Med Bay!" BB exclaimed.

"When did you two join the League?" Flash asked bewildered.

"Last month with the other Titans," Raven answered.

"Bats let the Titans join?"

"Yeah after Raven saved the world, with a little help from the rest of us, Superman came to the tower and gave us the invitation," BB said.

"But Bats wouldn't let kids run around the tower."

"Hey we're heroes too. Just because we're younger, smarter and …"

"If you say faster, I'm going to have to say that you're a liar," Flash interrupted.

"I wasn't," BB protested.

"Uh-huh, sure you weren't kid"

"_World domination!_"

"Here, since you two are hiding up here, take the bird. He's starting to irritate me," Flash said, handing the bird to Raven. "Have fun kids. Ignore him when he starts to swear." Flash took off.

"_Must seek revenge!_"

"That man is evil," Raven said, glaring after Flash.

BB just shrugged. "You're the expert." Raven glared at him. "Ummm…"

Flash dashed down the hall towards his room. There were some weird things going on, that was for sure. Batman allowing Superman to invite the Teen Titans to be part of the Justice League? Shayera not knowing her nickname? It was just…odd. Maybe that bump on the head was making things seem off when they really weren't. He was almost at his room when he noticed J'onn coming out of his room wearing a very nice suit. In fact it looked like something Bruce would wear out of the Batsuit. He whistled.

"Nice suit, Martian Man," he said.

"Thank you."

"Where are you going all dressed up?"

"I am going to meet a friend."

"What's she look like?"

"Go get some sleep, Wally." J'onn took off down the hall, morphing as he walked. Flash shook his head. Even after all this time, it was still eerie to watch. He went into his room and laid down. J'onn had a good idea. He was definitely tired.

Author Notes: Hey kids glad to hear you enjoied this one Shout outs!

balletangel19:I hate to disappoint you but no Flash doesn't go insane... I think

linschickrule101: here's your update!

sokerfreek922: yes it was on the JLA Unlimited fanfic site and still is, I just added it to this one too. But hey thanks for reading on both sites!

wicked-omen: hey here's your update!


	3. Its Another Turn on the Roller Coaster

Disclaimer: Not mine… how sad is that?

It's Another Turn on the Roller Coaster of Weird

Location Unknown

Wally stretched and sat up in bed. The clock on the table beside him said he'd only been asleep for about half an hour. That was odd, because he usually slept at least three. He reached up to his comm. link to contact J'onn. It wasn't in his ear and his mask was missing. In fact his entire uniform was missing.

He got out of bed and realized he wasn't on the Watchtower at all. He looked around the room. At least he knew where he was. J'onn must have had Supes or somebody drop him off at his apartment, which would also explain the clock. Rubbing his stomach, Wally walked out of his room...

… and received the shock of his life. There standing in the middle of the living room was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She had waist length black hair, a pale complexion and the oddest amber eyes.

"Hi. Let me guess, you heard there was a hot guy living here…"

"So you're the Flash?" she interrupted. The once over she gave him was enough to leave him feeling a little hot under the collar. "You aren't what I expected."

"Do I know you?" Wally asked, having a sudden attack of déjà vu.

"We've met before."

"If we've met before then how come I'm not what you expected?"

"Because we met inside the speed force and I am fairly certain you were wearing a mask."

"Oh, dang… the mask. Bats is gonna kill me. You know who I am. This can not be good."

"I hardly see how it does considering I've known who you were since you obtained your power."

"This conversation is making no sense."

"It isn't supposed to," she said morphing into a variation of himself.

Wally blinked. Then blinked again. And again. And every time he blinked another version of _him_ appeared. He finally caught on and stopped. There were fifteen variations of himself standing in the living room.

"Okay, I am so finding out what in the world J'onn gave me."

"Don't," one of the Flashes said. He was about eighteen in age and dressed in a pair of jeans and a yellow t-shirt. "He'll make us go away."

"Die," groaned a dead Flash in a black uniform.

Wally dashed to the other side of the room. "Somebody get that thing away from me!"

Shayera came in from the kitchen. "Wally, what's wrong?"

"Can't you see them?" he screeched hysterically.

"See who? There's no one here but you and me," she said calmly.

"The other 'mes'. There over there in a black Flash uniform is a dead me. And there is one over there in a blue uniform just bouncing in place. And in that corner is an all huddled up me in black. CAN'T YOU SEE THEM?"

Shayera looked at him like he was crazy. "Watchtower, this is Hawkgirl. We need some assistance at Flash's apartment. Can you send Superman or Batman, immediately?"

"Since when do you go by Hawkgirl again?"

"I've always gone by Hawkgirl. You know that."

"Shayera…"

"How do you know my name?"

Wally rolled his eyes and shoved a version of himself, this time dressed in a purple uniform, away. "You dropped your code name after the Thanagarian invasion, remember?"

She gave him a funny look. "Thanagar has been gone for almost ten years, Wally. I was a refugee sent here by my parents."

"No you were a spy sent by the Thanagarian army to discover our weaknesses and exploit them. When they attacked you gave us information on how to stop them. You were branded a traitor. You only recently rejoined the League."

"You're wrong, you know," the Wally in the blue t-shirt said.

"Shut up, you," Wally replied.

"I didn't say anything," Shayera said.

"Not you, one of the other Wallys is being stupid."

"I'm sad," the blue shirted Wally said. "Stupid is the Flash in purple."

"What?"

"Wally, I'm going up to the roof to wait for Superman or Batman."

"Fine, but tell Clark to use his x-ray vision before coming down. He'll tell you I'm not crazy."

"Who's Clark?"

"Ummm… Superman. You know reporter by day, superhero by night. No, wait that's Bruce. Never mind."

"And Bruce is…"

"Batman."

"Okay. I'm leaving now."

"Whatever." Wally watched her go, then turned back to the other hims running around. "Okay somebody explain."

"We can't; you have to figure it out yourself," the Wally in the white t-shirt said.

"He's too stupid to figure it out," the Flash in the yellow uniform said.

"Yeah well you're a Justice Lord," Wally shot back.

"And you have the potential to be one, so I'd watch what I say."

"I'll never be a Justice Lord! Do you hear me? Never!"

"What was that Wally?" Superman asked, coming into the room.

Wally dashed over to him. "Come on Clark. Tell Shayera that you can see them. Please?"

"There's no one in here but the four of us," he replied gesturing to Shayera and Batman behind him.

"There are fifteen other versions of me in this room. They are all wearing weird clothing and…"

"Wally, there is no one else in here," Batman said, cutting off his rant.

"Shut up, Bruce."

The three of them exchanged a look. "See, he never should have been sent here."

"John said the Watchtower wasn't congruent to his recovery. He was still comatose when we moved him," Batman replied.

"Ummm… I was not. I talked with all three of you not two hours ago in the mess hall."

"Wally, you've been in a coma for almost two months."

"I was on a mission with Black Canary and Green Arrow earlier this morning. Vandal Savage let a dragon loose in Death Valley. Ask them, Black Canary got hurt."

Again the three exchanged looks. "Okay we are taking you back to the Watchtower."

"Fine by me. Just make sure they stay here," he said gesturing to the "Others" as he walked out of the room.

* * *

"Here, try this one on," Shayera said, flipping the dress through the partially opened door. 

"Where in Man's World did you find these? I am positive that this is not a dress. In fact it barely passes for half a dress!" Diana exclaimed.

"I don't know. That one definitely draws attention to your…attributes," Shayera said, chuckling.

"I don't want it to draw attention to my… attributes. I want it to…" she stopped. "Okay I want it to draw attention to my attributes, but in a more subtle way."

"You are harder to shop with than Dinah, you know that? And she usually has Ollie's credit card," Shayera said as she walked out of the dressing rooms. "How did I get talked into this?"

Before Diana could spit out a come back, both of their comm. links went off. "Diana, Shayera, we have a problem with Flash. You need to get back to the Watchtower, NOW!" Batman's voice held a sense of panic and urgency that neither knew him to posses.

"We're on our way," Shayera told him as Diana spun into her Wonder Woman costume and out of the floor-length ball gown. They arrived at the Watchtower and hurried to the private conference room reserved for the seven original members. Superman, Batman, and John were waiting.

"Where's J'onn?" Diana asked.

"With Flash. He came back from his date with Gypsy early when Flash started screaming in his mind. As of five minutes ago he lost contact and can't get back in," Batman said, his monotone even more depressing than usual.

"Does Flash have the ability to do that? On his own?" Shayera asked dumbfounded.

"Not unless you have been teaching him some of your tricks," Batman said.

"That was uncalled for, Bruce," Shayera shot back. "Wally is like a brother to me. I wouldn't hurt him for the world."

"Whatever."  
"What's our plan?" Diana said before they could start really fighting.

"We don't have one," John replied, clutching Shayera's hand. "His blood work is fine. His brain waves are the only thing wrong."  
The door to the conference room opened and J'onn entered. "We need to find Savage if we want to save his life."

"What does Savage have to do with all of this?" Superman asked.

"Not him, the dragon." _'I need you to come to the med bay,'_ he said telepathically to Batman. The dark knight mentally nodded.

Superman, John, Diana and Shayera went to organize the other members in a search for the dragon. Batman followed J'onn down the hall.

_'How bad is it?'_

_'Bad enough. We might actually lose him,' _the Martian replied.

_'You do realize that really isn't an option.'_

_'We may not be able to stop it.'_

_'If he dies, the Justice Lords may become a reality and everything we have worked for will be for nothing.'_

_'I'm well aware of that, Batman. There is something greater at work here than we can fight.'_

_'Then get the magicians on it.'_

_'They too are looking for the dragon.'_

_'Let the League look for it. Call them up here.'_

_'Our job is to protect the helpless. I can't do that.'_

_'Look in there and tell me Wally isn't helpless.'_

_'Bruce…'_

_'You can't, J'onn and you know it. Do you want another death on your hands?'_ With that final parting remark, Batman spun on his heel and left J'onn standing in the middle of the hall, staring after him.

* * *

Back in Wally's head… 

He stepped off the transporter pad and looked around. There was something wrong with the Watchtower…something very wrong. It looked like the old one. The one they had before the Thanagarian invasion. Wally turned to Superman. "Come on Clark. Is this payback for something I did? Because this isn't funny."

Superman and Batman exchanged looks. Superman was the first one to speak. "Wally, my name isn't Clark."

"What? Oh sorry. Kal, this still isn't funny."

"Wally, that isn't my name either. It's Bruce."

The red headed speedster took a few steps backwards. "No, your name is Clark Kent and you are a reporter for the Daily Planet. You came to Earth from Krypton when you were a baby and were raised by Martha and Jonathan Kent in Smallville, Kansas. I know, I met them."  
"That's impossible," Batman spoke up. "Martha and Jonathan Kent were killed almost five years ago. I know, I was there," he said pulling off the face mask. There was the man that Wally knew as Bruce Wayne.

"Why the hell would you be in Smallville, when the Kents were killed?"

"Because I am Clark Kent."

"WHAT?" He took a few more steps back and fell off the transporter block. "Where's Diana, J'onn and GL? And if you're Clark Kent," he said pointing to Superman, "who the heck are you?"

"Bruce Wayne," Superman answered. Wally started shaking his head. "You got my arrival on Earth right except I landed in Gotham City. Martha and Thomas Wayne found me and since they couldn't have children, they "adopted" me."

"Then where did you come from?" Wally asked the Bat again.

"The Kents are my biological parents," he answered.

"This is sick, wrong and very confusing. Where's GL? I need to talk to GL."

"That's the second time you've mentioned this GL," Shayera said. "Who is he?"

Wally began shaking his head. "That's it I officially want to go home."

"You are home."

"Nope. This can't be it. GL is the Green Lantern, John Stewart." He whirled to face Shayera. "You should know him. You two had been dating for at least a couple of months when the Thanagarians invaded and you finally got back together after GL got smart and dumped Vixen." The three of them looked at each other. "What?"

Shayera walked up to Wally and placed her palm on his cheek. "Wally, we've been married for almost three years. And none of us have ever heard of John Stewart or the Green Lantern."

"Could you repeat that?"

"We have never heard of John Stewart or the Green Lantern," Superman said.

"You know you are starting to sound more like Bats. Could you stop?" He looked into Shayera's eyes. "You aren't making this up? This isn't some trick that Ollie talked you into?"

"I don't know any Ollie and I'm not making this up."

"So I don't suppose you two know Diana of Themyscira aka Wonder Woman or J'onn Jones aka the Martian Manhunter?"

"Of course we know Diana. She's Bruce's wife and Themyscira's ambassador. But the manhunter, he's new to us," Batman answered.

"So who's married to Lois?"

"Lane?" Clark asked. "She's married to President Luthor."

"No! Take that back. That mad man is not president!"  
"Mad man? Wally, Lex Luthor is one of the most upstanding men on this planet."

"Right and I suppose you've never heard of Brainiac either."

"Yes, Flash, how may I help you?"

Wally turned in dread at the sound of the digitized voice. There on the wall of the Watchtower were the three circles of Brainiac's signature. "What is that killing machine doing on the Watchtower?"

"My parents sent Brainiac with me when I was saved from Krypton's destruction," Clark answered.

"Say what? This isn't funny, guys. For real, I want the truth!" Wally screamed.

"You can't handle the truth!" Superman said. "Look at you."

Wally looked down at himself. "Yeah, I see me. You guys are the ones who have the wrong names."

"That bump on the head must have been worse than we originally thought," Shayera said to Batman.

"I am in the room you know," Wally said.

The three of them ignored him. He wandered over to the massive windows and looked down on Earth. At least that was still ok. Wally leaned forward and let the glass cool his feverish forehead.

"Is something wrong Wally?" a deep voice asked.

Wally turned and there stood John Henry Irons, the man he knew as Steel. "Where's your suit?"

"Suit?"

"Yeah, your battle suit."

"I don't have a battle suit. I'm a doctor. When your brain waves started becoming normal we sent you home, hoping that it would help when you woke up."

"We?"

"Yes, me and my assistant, Amanda Waller."

**_A/N:_** So what have we learned in this chapter… that Clark Kent is Batman; that Bruce Wayne is Superman and married to Diana (who is not Wonder Woman) and that Wally and Shayera are married and there is no Green Lantern. Feel free to express outrage… my roommates tried to kill me after they proofed this.


	4. Getting Out of Dodge

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own them; I just want to screw with their world for a while.

Getting Out of Dodge

The Watchtower in Wally's head…

"I'm sorry; I could have sworn you just said Amanda Waller." Wally was beginning to get very upset. This was so far into wrong that he wasn't even sure who _he_ was.

"I did," John replied. "She is one of the most dedicated doctors I have ever met. After the death of Batgirl last year, they felt we needed more help up here."

Wally held up his hands. "Stop, just stop there. What do you mean Batgirl is dead? I would have heard about it."

"Wally, you were at her funeral."  
"I was not."

John began rubbing his forehead. "I think we need to run some more tests on you. The med bay is through those doors to the right. Amanda will get started on them."

"I am not going in to a room with a bunch of needles and let that crazy woman clone me."

John threw up his hands and walked over to the other heroes. Wally sighed. He wanted to go home; the only question was how to get there. He was lost in thought when he saw J'onn materialize in the far corner of the room. "Hey, if you don't know J'onn, how come he's in the corner?"

"What are you talking about, Wally? There's only the five of us in here," Clark/Batman said.

"Why don't you go visit Amanda in the med bay and I'll be there in a minute," Shayera said.

Wally noticed J'onn nod and agreed. He walked out of the room noticing when J'onn followed. Glancing over his shoulder, he noticed they weren't even watching his departure. The doors slid closed behind him and he turned left towards the hanger instead of going right to the med bay. J'onn followed. They walked for a few tense seconds in silence before Wally found a spot. He looked for any sort of cameras or other recording devices. Just because Batman was Clark Kent in this whacked out world didn't mean he wasn't still paranoid. He couldn't find anything and looked at the Martian.

"They said you weren't here," Wally whispered.

"I'm not. This is a mind game. You have to find a way out."

"Can't you do it?"

"No. There is a discrepancy here that will let you out."

"A what?"

"An abnormality."

"There are at least 20 of them, J'onn. 15 of which are currently in my apartment!" Wally cried.  
"Wally." J'onn voice instantly calmed the speedster. He was talking in that better-pay-attention-or-you-are-going-to-miss-something tone that the Bat usually used. "You have to do this yourself. Just wait, it will come to you."

"Wally." Amanda Waller came around the corner and J'onn vanished. "What are you doing?"

"Looking for the med bay?"

"It's back this way. Didn't John tell you where it was?"

"Yeah but he was looking at me when he said it so his right was my left."

"Oh well that explains it. Come on, let's run some tests."

Wally followed the hated woman back to the med bay and let her tuck him into a machine that looked like hair dryers in a salon. He recognized it from the villain files as the machine that turned John Dee into Dr. Destiny. If his memory was working right it was supposedly an ESP machine. Now if he could tap into the ESP part, maybe it would be the thing that would break him out of this insane place.

Amanda strapped him in and turned on the machine. To his utter disappointment the machine simply read his brain waves, took his blood pressure, and measured his heartbeat. When she dismissed him, Flash took off for another part of the Watchtower. He really didn't know where to start, so he ran through the entire satellite looking for anything that might give him a clue. After an hour of searching, he realized that this Watchtower had nothing of his in it. Well, if that was the case then what he needed was to get back to Earth and talk to the other versions of him. He went down to the transporter pad via the cafeteria and heard the others talking.

"We can't let him go back down there," Shayera was saying.

"I know that but if he stays up here or we force him to he'll know something is up," Bruce/ Superman replied.

"This is getting harder to do."

"Have you told him yet?"

"No. I don't think he even remembers I was pregnant and I want to keep it that way. He'll feel like it was his fault that I miscarried."

Wally felt like a ton of bricks just smacked him in the head. _'A baby? Shayera and I were expecting a **BABY**?' _He couldn't shake the thought, let alone wrap his mind around sleeping with a woman he thought of as a sister. _'Whoa stop that train right now, Wally. Different universe…'_ He could hear her crying and Bruce/Superman comforting her. This was just too much for the speedster. He was going home… NOW.

The transporter room was empty. Wally knew that if he did transport down they wouldn't be far behind him. He started playing with coordinates on the screen. It took a few minutes but he reprogrammed the coordinates for the different cities. Metropolis was now Hong Kong. That should keep them busy for a while. He set the transporter to send him to Detroit aka Central City, then immediately transport air to Central City aka Miami. Hopefully his alter ego here was as much a ladies' man as he was normally and they wouldn't think anything of it. Wally hit the send button and dashed to the pad. He disappeared in the traditional blue light.

J'onn watched as Wally reprogrammed the teleporter pad coordinates. Satisfied that Wally knew what he was supposed to do, J'onn turned his attention to trying to explain why Wally was suffering this dream like state. It was abnormal. The dragon couldn't have been that powerful but since he hadn't been raised among the legends of dragons, who was he to say that it wasn't powerful. J'onn took the vial of Wally's blood and began adding chemicals to it, hoping that something would appear to explain this.

Wally dashed into his apartment. The other versions of him were still hanging around. The dead Flash was the first to see him.

"Baaaaaaaaack," he drawled in his odd zombie voice.

"When I get home, I'm never watching another zombie movie," Wally muttered. "So what are you guys?"

"We are your emotions," the Wally in the white shirt said. "Or strong aspects of your personality."

"Oh. Which one are you?"

"I am innocence," he replied.

"But the Flash in the yellow uniform looks like the one I battled when Luthor brought the Justice Lords out to fight."

"I am in the room you know," the afore mentioned Justice Lord replied.

"I'm pretty sure that I'm not a Lord of any kind," Wally shot back.

"No, but you have the potential to be," the green suited Flash said.

"Oh. Who are you?"

"Knowledge."

"I have that?"

"And he wonders why the other League members think he's a twit," the pink Flash said.

"Hey, I'm not a twit and if I am, that makes you one too." The pink Flash stuck his tongue out at Wally. "Which one is he?" he asked Knowledge.

"Sarcasm. Let's quit playing the guessing game ok. The "Wallys" are as follows: red angry, blue sad, green jealousy, yellow calm, orange happiness, black fear and white innocence. The "Flashs" are: yellow Justice Lord, me knowledge, white wimpy, orange superior, purple stupid, pink sarcastic, blue hyper, and black dead."

"Nice. So you're the smart one. How do I get home?"

"Wake up."

"Yeah last time I did that I wound up here."

"No you are still asleep. Just wake up."  
"How am I supposed to do that?"

"How are you supposed to do what, Wally?"

Wally spun around and there stood the other three members of the League. "Umm, fall asleep." He mentally smacked himself in the forehead.

"Why didn't you just do that on the Watchtower?" Shayera asked.

"Because I wanted to be at home."

"That doesn't sound like something you would normally do," Clark/Batman said.

"Yeah well apparently nothing I'm doing today sounds normal," Wally said.

"Concussions can changes people's behavior for a short time after they wake up," Bruce/Superman replied.

"Do you guys do that often?" Wally asked.

"Do what?"

"Talk about me like I'm not in the room."

"It never bothered you before," Shayera said.

"Oh ok." He watched as they visibly relaxed. Without warning he zoomed out the door.

"What the hell?" was all he heard from Batman. They would be coming after him, that was a given. He ran as fast as he could for about an hour. Hopefully that would give him enough time to fall asleep. He found a creek in a wooded area that would do just fine. Wally snuggled up with some moss and slowly counted backwards from 10. At 2, he heard footsteps, but was in that place where sleep and awake kind of mixes and one isn't sure if they're dreaming or not. He counted one and never saw the smoke pellet Batman rolled at him.

Wally woke up in the med bay. He was attached to a bunch of machines that were making a tremendous amount of noise. He turned his head to the side and there sat Shayera. He groaned. Her head snapped up from the book she was reading.

"How are you feeling?"

"Are we married?"

"What?"

"Are. We. Married?" he asked with precise deliberation.

"No. Why?"

"Good, because having a baby with you was almost worse."

"Wally are you ok?"

"Absolutely, Feathers."

"Since when do you call me Feathers?"

"Oh hell no, I am _not _doing this again." He sat up and pulled every wire, tube, and non-permanent thing he could get his hands on. Shayera tried to stop him, once. The look he gave her caused her to back off and she didn't try to interfere. He got off the gurney style bed and went in search of the Martian, sincerely hoping that one existed in what ever nut hole he got dropped into this time.

To make his search shorter, he began screaming in his head. Less than thirty seconds in to the endeavor, J'onn's "voice" echoed in his head, telling him to stop or else. He stopped and waited for the Martian to give him his location. Wally made his way into the lab. J'onn gave him a look, which let him know that the Martian was irritated.

"You should be in the med bay," J'onn said.

"Why was in the med bay?"  
"You know why you were there."

"The dragon," Wally said, confident that he was right.

"What dragon?"

_'Oh man it didn't work,'_ he thought.

"What didn't work?" J'onn asked.

"Nothing. I'm just going to go lay down in my room."

"That would be a good idea."

Wally turned and left the lab. J'onn watched him go. He contacted the other founding members and asked them to meet him in the conference room. They arrived without much fanfare and waited for J'onn to start. "I think that Flash needs a vacation."

"Why?" GL asked.

"It might have something to do with the way he fled the med bay less then ten minutes ago," Shayera said.

"He was panicked upon wakening and hysterical. Flash then began a powerful mental projection that I have never felt him. He was terrified and when I asked if he knew why he was in the med bay, he told me that a dragon was responsible."  
"A dragon?" Batman asked, skeptical.

"That is correct."

"Maybe that knock on the head was stronger than we originally thought," Superman thought out loud. "Is there anyway to see if he extensive damage from the attack?"

"I looked when he was first brought in, but I can call him in for a follow up exam," J'onn replied.

"That sounds like a good idea," Superman said. "Do you want any help?"

"Not at this moment. But I shall ask if I require extra assistance."

The members left and J'onn asked Flash to come to the med bay. The speedster entered with trepidation. If they figured out that he wasn't their Flash, Wally wasn't sure what he was going to do.

"Come in, Flash. Please sit. Your behavior earlier has us worried. I would like to take a CAT scan of your brain."

"Why?"

"To make sure there was no more damage than what was already there."

"You're not going to read my mind, are you?"

J'onn looked taken aback. "Not if you don't want me to."

Wally nodded and got on to the bad. J'onn sent him into the machine and Wally tried to stay calm. This wasn't good. He wasn't sure where he was, but he was pretty sure that he wasn't home. The dragon comment seemed to be the key question. If he were home they would know about Savage and the dragon and Black Canary getting hurt. He yawned and went to sleep.

Reality…

"Have you found what's wrong yet?" John Stewart asked coming into the med bay.

"No," the Martian answered, his monotone voice doing nothing to comfort the Green Lantern.

"Did Zatanna have any ideas as to what type of spell Savage put on him?"

"Unfortunately, it is an ancient spell that comes from the worst book of black magic ever created. She was not happy when she left."

Batman walked into the med bay. "Are we sure that this isn't a result of the concussion?"

"Yes. He is traveling into other dimensions at least that is the conclusion that he has come to. And it seems to be triggered by him falling asleep. I managed to break through, once. Wally simply jumped from one "dimension" to the next. Whoever did this knew about the attack in Death Valley."

"What makes you say that?" John asked.

"Because not long after he was brought back, his brain waves changed. According to the machine, Wally should have been awake and alert. But he was and still is in his present condition. I have been unable to reach him," J'onn concluded.

"So that's it?" John asked again.

"I have tried every medical procedure that I know to bring him out of this, but nothing can break the spell Savage put on him. I could try a few Martian techniques, but not truly understanding how human physiology will respond I am reluctant to try it."

The machine next to Wally suddenly went off. J'onn walked over to it and read the print out.

"He had moved again. I'm afraid that if we don't get a handle on this soon, we may not get Wally back."

The three looked up as Superman came in carrying Huntress. Question was right on his heels. "Savage attacked Gotham City and Huntress ended up under an abandoned building."

Batman spun on his heel and was out the door before Superman finished his sentence. J'onn gestured towards the bed about ten feet from Wally and he gently laid her down. "This is getting out of hand. Do the magicians have any idea on what this is?"

John took Superman's arm and indicated that Question follow. He took them to the hallway to explain, giving J'onn the space to check out the unconscious heroine.


End file.
